Women's Conference

We had our stake women's conference on Saturday and Mary Ellen Edmonds came to speak to us. I took a few notes that I wanted to share. The main topic of her talk was Happiness. I thought, if she can be happy, I have no reason not to be. She is I would guess in her 60's, never been married and has no kids, and she is so happy. She said that we have no reason to not be the happiest people on earth. Here are a few bullet-points of things she talked about...
- How can we each cultivate a Spirit of gladness?
- Something is wrong if we aren't having joy now.
- If we have to stand alone, we must do it.
- If we as women will be united, our strength will be uncalcuable.

Then a member of the stake presidency spoke to us and I loved this analogy he made. He talked about Peter, when he got out of the boat and was trying to go ashore to be beside the Savior, his eyes were looking down at his feet and his focus was not the Savior, he wasn't at first successful on his way to the Savior and he was falling. When children learn to walk they lock eyes with you or whom ever they are walking towards, and they put one foot in front of the other, focused on their target. We need to keep our gaze on the Savior, so we don't sink and fall.

Gratitude

Wow, so I have been thinking a ton lately about all that I am blessed with. Do you ever feel like as a mom that some days you are just trapped. Don't get me wrong, motherhood is like the most amazing and rewarding experience of my life, but some days I just feel trapped, like the world around me doesn't exist and that I am going to lose it. I have also thought about how much I love reading my friends blogs because it makes me feel I am not the only one going through these life experiences. I think blogging was an inspired concept, it is my group therapy...really. You spill your guts out and friends read and comment, giving encouragement, then you can read your friends ups and downs and it makes you feel they are real just like you.
This week I have been noticing the beauty that is around me. It has been raining here this last week. I love the rain, in moderation, I love the rain. I need the sun, but rain is so nice and refreshing. I feel so thankful to live in such a beautiful place. Out of some of the windows in our home, we have a view of the local snow capped mountains and out of Hayden's upstairs window (three stories high) we can just about see the ocean. If one of the hills wasn't in the way, we would have an ocean view. Too often I get caught up (especially lately) in thinking about all the things I want, mainly a house. For some people their trial is that they suffer from depression, maybe they have a hard time getting pregnant, for me my trial right now is that we still haven't been able to purchase our own home and it is killing me. Amongst this and struggling with Hayden's hopefully age-related horrible behavior, by the way, I was told at 4 it gets easier. I was totally expecting the day he turned four, two weeks ago, to be a changing day for us. Then the other day someone said it changes when they are five, ahhh. In the meantime hopefully one of the three books I purchased off Amazon in a desperate search for some answers will help me. I hope they get here quickly. So, as I have been thinking about all of this lately, I have really been looking for answers and help, peace. My prayers lately have consisted of nothing but asking for things. Instead of reading my scriptures the other day I picked up my patriarchal blessing and read through that. In it it tells me to "take frequent opportunities to pour out your heart to your Father in Heaven for all the things you are blessed with, good health, living in a favored land...then as you do this Heavenly Father will bless you with things even without your asking." So, I have turned my focus instead to that of gratitude and I am amazed that such a simple thing has made all the difference. It is so easy sometimes to get caught up in selfishness, and I am guilty of that more than I realize. But today and hopefully from here on out, I am grateful.

I have been tagged, thanks cousin Nicki

Alright, so my cous Nicki tagged me I don't want to be a party pooper (here I go potty talking, it's a good thing Hayden can't read yet or he would probably give me a time out, J/K), so apparently I have to write 10 quirky, weird, random things, facts, habits about myself. So, I am sucking down my pride, hold on, big gulp, and here we go.

1) I have a huge dream of composing a song, words and music. The whole shebang. I have wanted to do this for a very long time, and one of these days I will.
2) Two different times in my life I have trained for a marathon, but both times I had to stop running at about 8 miles due to either my knee or my back going out on me. Running a marathon is still a huge goal for me. Right now I run about 10 miles a week with my running buddies.
3) I have always wanted to learn to clog, ever since I went to Ireland my senior year. I was fascinated with the way they danced. I am waiting until I lose some more flab though because who wants to see a clogger with flab bouncing around? Not me, so I have a little more work to do before working on this one.
4) For about a year, I have been working memorizing The Familiy Proclamation. I have been stuck on the 4th paragraph for about that long, a year. After I memorize this, I want to work on memorizing my patriarchal blessing.
5) This next item would fall under weird, if you haven't already thought some of the above things are weird enough, I am obsessive about keeping lists, files and so forth. I keep an on-going list of what I want my dream house to look like (clipping photos from wherever any time I see something I like), I keep a file with kids games, activities, FHE Lessons, health or church articles, Quotes, websites, cute invitations I receive and on and on. You name it and I probably have a file for it in the file cabinet.
6) Maybe some of you already knew this about me, but I am way cheap. If it is not on sale, I usually won't buy it. This is especially true when it comes to clothing. I NEVER look at regular priced items. Clearance racks are always the place you will find me in a clothing store, target, Wal-Mart- anywhere there is a clearance rack, there will you find me also.
7) Something way quirky about me is my left eye brow. Ever since I started paying attention to my eyebrows, my left eye brow is never tame. The hair at the beginning of my brow fans out and drives me nuts. If I pluck it back to where I get rid of the fanning hair, my eye brows look even more funky because it makes it short. Hayden has this same quirk.
8) Speaking of hair, this one may be too personal but here it goes, for years I have noticed two black hairs that grow side by side on my right forearm. I have to pluck these every few weeks. And even worse, a few months ago I noticed black hairs popping up on my face that I have had to start plucking. Please if you ever notice a black hair on my chin or around my lips, tell me people. I was so embarrassed when I noticed these and wondered how long they had been there. I have tried to tame the black hairs now that I know they are there. I think I am producing too much testosterone, The boys hormones are rubbing off on me in ways I never imagined. A few times I have been tempted to grab the razor in the shower and just shave, but I am pretty sure that would make the situation way out of control.
9) I love hot cocoa. I have a cup of it just about every night. I put the kids in bed, come downstairs and boil my water and sit at the computer. In fact I am waiting for it to boil as I type. So far Stephen's is my very favorite. Hot cocoa makes me feel happy and so warm inside. Mmmm. I totally use food to comfort me, hence my un-forgivable thighs.
10) For the last one, I have a dream of becoming a franchise owner of either a Cafe Rio or In-N-Out, even though I think both are still corporate owned, I still have a dream of running a restaurant or having a coin-op Car Wash Bay, or running a children's singing/music studio.
11) OK, so I am going to add two more, I am terrified of flying. That is probably my greatest fear, even before 9/11, I hated it- but since 9/11 I hate it so much more.
12) I am a terrible house cleaner. It is usually not first on my list of things to do, especially since I started working and blogging. I spend a lot of time on the computer- mainly for my job.
13) Lastly, I know I said only two more, I lied. This last one is a confession- what the heck does i.e. stand for??? Can someone help me out with that one because I use it, but I don't totally know what it stands for, in essence???
14) Last one I promise, blue is my favorite color since it makes me think of the three "men" in my life.

Ecco

If you have children, and your children speak, then I am sure you have heard similar things to the story I am about to relate to you. The other night it was time to get for bed, the kids were in the bath so I decided to run up before they were done (don't freak out, they weren't left in the tub alone, Jared was in there with them), and grab their jammies. Well, I came down, the kids got out of the bath and dried off (Hayden streaked through the house like a mad man, his after bath/being naked ritual) then the jammie routine began. As soon as he saw the jammies I had picked out for him, he said "mom, I can't wear those jammies, they make me too sweatie." Well, he is his own heater, even if it has been in the thirties at night lately, I believe him when he says he isn't cold, so I said he could run upstairs and grab another pair of jammies, but to take up the ones I had brought down and to please put them away. His response to my request, "mom, you got those jammies out and it is your responsibility to put them away." Jared and I just started laughing while Hayden tried to do all he could to not laugh himself. I took his hand and we went upstairs together and found a different pair of jammies.
I hear myself in the things he says way too much though, silly kid.

Lesson Learned...

Oft times I am humbled by the wisdom and innocence of my little Hayden. Tonight was one of those times. We were in his room getting him ready for bed and he had a sword he got from SeaWorld today (Grammy and Papa took him for his birthday, I think this is the final last hooray- although he has already started asking when his next birthday is). I told him he could only keep the sword in his room as long as it stayed on his floor and he didn't get out of bed to play with it, he is funny about being able to see where some of his favorite toys are, even if he can't play with them he just wants to know they are there. He thought for a moment then asked, "well how will you know if I get out of my bed?" My response was quick and I was thinking about relaxing on the couch for a few minutes, having the house to myself, so I said "because mommy knows everything, please get into bed." He thought for only a moment then said, "mommy, if you know everything isn't that being prideful?" I was immediately humbled and told him I was sorry and explained to him how I could hear his feet from downstairs when he gets out of bed. He was more satisfied with that answer, as was I.
I was walking through the mall with Carson today when I happened to read the height limit for the children's play area, which is 42'' in the mall. Yesterday Hayden had his 4 year physical and the nurse told us he is 41 1/2''. I never thought the time would come so soon when my little boy is too big for the kid play area. It made me sad to think about how quickly he is growing up. Then I reflect on the poem I put up earlier today about how babies don't keep, and to put everything else aside to enjoy this time with my kids while they are young. They are so precious.

Love This...

" Cleaning and scrubbing can wait for tomorrow,
For babies grow up, I've learned, to my sorrow.
So Quiet down, cobwebs. Dust, go to sleep.
I'm rocking my baby, and babies don't keep."
- Author Unknown

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Happy Birthday Hayden

Wow, we have had a crazy last few weeks. Our Christmas was so great, I can't believe I haven't written since then, but we had a great time at home with the kids. We spent the day at my parents and played with toys all day long. We all got the stomach flu right after Christmas and Jared ended up taking the whole week off due to being sick, so it was actually kind of nice. Hayden started school again last week, hallelujah. We were so excited for that to start again and to get back into our routine. We celebrated Hayden's 4th birthday last week. He had several celebrations. The first was a party at our house about a week ago with some friends. He has been talking about having a party with a pinata for months, so I decided this year I couldn't just get away as I always have with just doing something with the family. So, he insisted on having a Spiderman party and we had a great time. After the party, I can't tell you how many times he came up and hugged my leg and said "thanks so much for my spiderman party." It was very fun for him. His actual birthday was about 5 days after his party, and he was very confused about us celebrating his birthday again. He kept saying, but I already turned four. On his birthday he also kept telling everyone he had gotten taller when he woke up that morning. I think he was expecting a literal change in his size. He went to school and shared cupcakes with all his friends and insisted on Ramen for dinner, I could manage with that. To top it all off, my grandparents were visiting this week from Texas, straying in Newport Beach. So, we saw them several times and had a great time with them. So, off to start a new week.